Am I Wrong For Ruining My Son’s Wedding?

My son went from being a young husband and father to a cheater and absent father. When my grandson was born with Down syndrome, Mike took it upon himself to ruin his relationship with Tommy’s mother, Jane. And then he left. Only for me to find out that he is marrying again.

I know that as mothers, we’re supposed to motivate and support our children. I agree wholeheartedly. And that’s why I believe that my actions were justified.

Here’s the backstory. My son, Mike, married when he was very young because his then-girlfriend, Jane, got pregnant. It was rushed, but I adored Jane from the first time I met her. She was the typical girl next door, and I loved that for Mike.

A few months later, sweet little Tommy — my first grandchild — was born! He was born with Down syndrome and had the most beautiful blue eyes ever. But Tommy being born with Down Syndrome changed everything for Jane and Mike. Mike started cheating on her, and irrespective of their child and share history, he ended up filing for divorce.

Mike left Tommy with only Jane to care for him. Of course, I was still around and would do anything and everything to help them both. But it wasn’t the same. A child needs to have both parents — provided that they are alive and breathing.

But Mike didn’t bother to try to see his baby or help out in any way. I couldn’t believe that my son could be so heartless.

I begged him to come back or to at least help Jane out. But he shut the door in my face every single time.

And then, the plot thickens.

Last month, my nephew, Liam, came over to pick up a cake for his mother — I am the designated family baker. And he told me that Mike was getting married again.

I was astonished.

Granted, I barely knew anything about Mike these days. From his new job to who he was seeing, I knew nothing. All I knew now was that Mike had found some poor girl to marry him. And that I wasn’t invited. I asked Liam for the address, and he gave it without hesitation.

All I could think about was Jane and Tommy. When did Mike turn into such a different man?

Fast forward to the wedding.

I remember hearing Mike’s voice when I was walking up the church as he said his vows. I strolled in, holding Tommy on my hip, his sticky hands in my hair. The shock on Mike’s face will forever be priceless to me.

“Before you say, ‘I do’ again, Michael St. John, meet your first ‘I did’ and the family you abandoned,” I said.

I addressed his poor fiancée. She was a sweet young girl, and I felt terrible that the distraught look on her face was because of me.

Then, the officiant called for a break, telling the guests to go outside and get a drink before the ceremony resumed. I was okay with that. As much as I wanted to embarrass Mike, I didn’t want to hurt his bride more than necessary. But very few people walked out. Most of Mike’s family was amused by what I said, while his bride’s family could barely contain their shock.

I spilled everything — from how he got married young to having Tommy, cheating on Jane, and finally, divorcing her without any financial help for his son. I warned her about what she was getting into.

“He may be my blood,” I told her, with Mike pacing behind her, “but I didn’t raise him to be like this. Jane is more of a daughter to me now than Mike is a son.”

I held Tommy closer to me, my little grandson who brought so much love into my life, while he sucked his thumb.

“Your son deserves a father who doesn’t walk away from him. You are horrible, Mike. And such a different person from that lovely boy I raised and loved more than anything.”

I walked out, leaving a room full of stunned guests, a son in shock, and his fiancée re-evaluating the man she fell in love with.

The day after, Liam and his mother (my sister) came over for coffee.

Liam said that Mike’s fiancée burst into tears as the church doors closed behind Tommy and me. He said she threw her wedding bouquet at Mike, took off her shoes, and left the ceremony, with her family running after her.

Mike was embarrassed, furious, and bewildered in front of the guests, who were rooted to their seats, probably waiting for Jane to appear.

I know that maybe ruining his wedding seems a little drastic. I’ll admit it. But the point of this entire thing was to teach Mike a valuable lesson.

Things are not over for him — he can still make it right for Tommy. I am open to Mike returning to our family as a son and father. Or, if that is too much for him, I will settle for him taking financial responsibility for Tommy in some way.

But you tell me: Am I right for ruining my son’s wedding? If so, thank you for understanding.

If not, what would you do in my place?

While you’re thinking about that, here’s another story for you: As Jane is getting ready to marry Anthony, she receives anonymous messages warning her from doing so. When she follows a wild goose chase to a nearby hotel, she finds the reason behind the warnings.

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